The condensed version of, "I told you this would happen, but you wouldn't listen." is, "I told you so." It's been ingrained in me and I think, most, if not all of you, that saying "I told you so" is wrong. It's considered to be harsh, inconsiderate, unkind, jabbing; and therefore, the most unloving and graceless thing to say to anyone after they've neglected to heed wise counsel, and find themselves in an unsavory and often, painful situation.

"Call me crazy, but in the history of conversations, has the phrase 'I told you so' ever really generated a positive response? I'd say no, it has not...'I told you so' is a negative and counterproductive way of saying, 'I’m right and you’re wrong,' that does neither party any good. Even if the person in the wrong has been stubborn and refused constructive advice, that does not give another person the authority to rub their face in it...

"If you must say something, please do so the properly way. That is, be a friend and not a bully. Instead of saying, 'I told you so,' look to your sensibility and maturity for guidance. Try to offer a positive spin on the situation that will make your friend feel better."

-Richie Frieman, Modern Manners Guy

Being a mom, and especially a Christian mom, is hard. It's what I call, hard heart-work. God builds a special bond between a mother and each of her children. There's something inexplicably wonderful about the life that proceeds from a mother's womb. Which is why abortion is such a horrible and wicked thing to encourage women to do—to strip herself of the beautiful life God graciously gave her in spite of what sins she may have committed, or what sins may have been committed against her. 

Every child is an unmerited gift from God.

Therefore, in view of God's mercy, we offer ourselves as living sacrifices, holy and acceptable to God, which is our spiritual worship. This command extends to motherhood also. Which means, rather than mothering our children in order to please and seek love for self, we care for our children in order to please and love God and our children sacrificially, and not just when it's easy, fun and dignified. It means we must love God and our children even when it's hard, painful and humiliating. And those three words often sum up the other side of motherhood that many of us neither want to think about or talk about. But we must.

Motherhood is a beautiful thing. It's filled with incalculable joys and fears from the moment you realize God has graced you with the ability to bring forth life.

I remember my first pregnancy; amazed that there was another human being inside of me; that God was secretly forming every part of him: visible (his body and personality) and invisible (his soul). My son was safely tucked in my womb, hidden from view and harm. And it was my job to keep it that way—to love and protect my child—to do him good and not harm all the days of his life—to train him in the love and discipline of the Lord (Eph 6:4). And it's still my job because a mother doesn't stop laboring for her children when she gives birth. A mother stops laboring for her children when either she or they, die their first death.

Sometimes a mother's labor results in great joy and sometimes it results in great pain. A mother has great joy when she gets to see the physical fruit of her labor—a living being from her womb; and when she gets to see the spiritual fruit of her labor—the life of her child secured in Christ. Along with these joys come the arduous, daily heart-work of keeping your child healthy, clean, fed, clothed, warm, safe and especially, Christ-honoring. A mother who fears the LORD, joyfully and willingly sacrifices her own comforts for her child's comforts. She would happily give up her food and go hungry, rather than see her child go hungry. She would cheerfully give up her sweater or coat and be cold, rather than see her child shiver. She would generously give up all her strength and be weak, rather than see her child hurting; and she would, without hesitation, joyfully give up her own life, rather than take the life of her child. A mother who fears the LORD, sacrifices everything, whether great or small, for her child's benefit, without consideration for her own. That's the way God made us. And that's what Jesus exampled for us when He disrobed Himself of His glory, left Heaven, and came to earth—to suffer, to die, and to rise from the grave, to grant eternal life, to all who repent and believe.

Being a mother isn't about fulfilling our already overweening egos. It's not about living our unfulfilled dreams and hopes through our children. It's not our second chance at life. It's our children's first chance to live the life God planned for them. Our children's lives are not about filling voids, trapping men, or something to be discarded because they're inconveniencing us somehow. Our children's lives are gifts from the Lord in spite of our sins, our frailties and ineptness; to properly love and care for another human being.

Being a mother who fears the Lord requires the willingness to suffer well and long for our children's best. It means being willing to tell your children hard truths about themselves, even if that means they won't like you...or even hate and totally reject you. It means daily feeding them the Gospel of Jesus Christ, reminding them that we're all sinners in desperate need of the one and only Savior. It means genuinely sharing your sins (age appropriate) so that they may learn and not fall into the same temptations. It means humbly asking them for forgiveness when you've sinned against them. It means living what you say you believe about Jesus; that He is sovereign, good, and perfect. Therefore, you're entire being, your thoughts, opinions, and conduct is based on what's found in the holy Word of God and not what's found in our defiled, self-absorbed world, or selves.

My hardest heart-work of being a mother has never been in the physical realm. It's always been the spiritual battles I've fought and continue to fight for and with my children, on my knees, and in my face-to-face conversations with them. I've always told my children that they can count on me to help them with anything...except sin. And I continue to remind them that I will stand against them, if necessary, with all the strength God provides, to give them what is good and not evil. It's extremely painful to watch my children sin (the same or differently than me), and this pain often causes me to want to crawl into a hole and just cry, but I don't...crawl into a hole. Rather, I follow my Savior and do what He did when He was here. I go to a lonely place (Lk 5:16) and I cry and talk to God Almighty (Ps 40:1-4, 16-17) instead of crying and talking to myself in the hole of self-pity.

I'd love to tell you that training up your children in the way of the Lord is easy and filled with stories of all the "great and amazing things God is doing" in their lives. I'd love to tell you that if you raise your children in the love and discipline of the Lord, they will love, honor and appreciate you. But I can't tell you any of these things because it's not true. Proverbs 22:6 is a precept for parents to obey, not a promise of absolute results.

We have two sons, 22 and 20. We raised them both in the love and discipline of the Lord Jesus Christ. We imperfectly lived out our faith before them; repenting to God and to our children whenever we sinned (which for me, was and still is, more often than I'd like). We always showed them how every rule for our family could be found in God's Word so that they would know that it is by the Lord's Word and standard, and not by our word and standard that our family is established and maintained.

With all our hearts, we loved and obeyed God's mandate to parents in Deuteronomy 6:5-9. Though I'm a night owl rather than a morning person, I willingly died to my natural inclinations, for how God created my children...to rise early (Php 2:3-4). During the first 18 years of my children's lives, I would wake up one and a half to two hours earlier than my children in order to have my personal praise and quiet time with the Lord, prepare a hot breakfast for our boys, and do our daily breakfast devotional. Between the ages of four and five, I taught them how to have their own praise and quiet time with the Lord; training them to wake up an hour before school so that they would have ample time for private and family worship.

When they were school-aged, we'd continue our talk about the Lord on the way to school, when I picked them up and as we did homework and played together. We'd pray and discuss the Lord at dinner, and during our "family time". When we took them to bed, we'd snuggle them (through age 13), prayed with them, then scratched their backs and massaged their heads as we sang any three songs they chose, to worship and praise our God together.

We literally have God's Word on our walls, on our furniture and everywhere you turn in our home. We purchased our children pocket Bibles so they would have God's Word with them wherever they go. I made them bookmarks with Scriptures to help them through trials and remind them of how to humbly receive praise. I made them lunch every day and included a simple note that reminded them of God's love, sovereignty and goodness in their lives. Since we felt led to public school our sons (I wouldn't recommend this to everyone, I recommend homeschooling), I practically lived at their schools, volunteering for everything I could: art assistant, music assistant, homeroom mom, office assistant, library assistant, chaperone, etc. I basically attended school with my children and walked or drove home with them when we were done. On the way home, I would ask them about how they witnessed God's goodness throughout their day.

Our sons were raised in sound doctrine and knowing how to interpret Scripture with Scripture rather than by their emotions or worldly philosophies. We purchased them reference Bibles by the time they both reached the third grade and taught them what the little numbers and letters next to verses and words meant and how to use the concordance in the back. We purchased a Holman Bible Atlas and taught them the timeline of events in the Bible as well as go over the maps so they could see the locations and distances of where people lived, how they traveled, and how far they traveled to obey God.

We purchased the Basic Training Course so that as a family, we might learn how to biblically and effectively share the true Gospel of God's grace rather than the prevalent, man-centered false gospel. We took the course together when our sons were 9 and 11, and we did all the activities together so that we might labor in the Lord's harvest field as a family. When they turned 12, we purchased Student Study Bibles (I recommend the ESV, it's excellent) so they could learn to study God's Word for themselves, with helpful resources and notes that were applicable for their life stage. There's much more that we did and still do with our oldest son who's still home with us, but I'll stop here because I think you get the point: my husband and I, with all our hearts, poured into our children, the love of God and the holy Word as best as we could.

I don't share any of this so you'll think highly of us. Rather, I share this with you to demonstrate that though you too may love and obey God's command in Deuteronomy 6:5-9, it's not to your glory if your children grow into Christ-honoring adults, nor your complete blame (if at all) if they grow into Christ-mocking adults. As I shared earlier, we have two sons, 22 and 20. Our youngest is our prodigal and left home at 19 to live his life as he pleased and not as God pleased. Our oldest is still with us while working to receive his graduate degree in Accounting. But that doesn't mean our oldest son is perfect and never brings us heartache like our youngest son does. It just means that though they were both raised in the love and discipline of our Lord, they walk divergent paths. We love them both dearly (for how can a mother lack compassion for a son from her womb?) and fervently pray for both of them to walk in a manner that's worthy of the Lord Jesus Christ (Col 1:9-12).

Though sometimes Christ-honoring parents are blessed to raise Christ-honoring children, some of us are blessed to continue our labor for our children's eternal souls until the day one of us dies. And sometimes those who aren't Christ-honoring parents, produce Christ-honoring children (e.g., Madalyn Murray O'Hair, the famous atheist, who's oldest son William "Bill" became a Christian because of God's sovereign choosing and the faithful labor of others). This is why we can't take credit or full blame for how our children choose to live. God is sovereign and all knowing and all wise. We are not.

While the rejection of our youngest son continues to pain us, the greatest heartache isn't that he isn't reconciled to us, but that he's not reconciled to God Almighty. My heart grieves every time either of our sons sin and succumbs to ways of the world (what's cool and popular) over the holy ways of God that are good and right. But their lives are not mine to hold, rather their lives are mine to entrust to the LORD who alone is faithful (2 Tim 2:13).

Whatever stage you're currently in with your mothering, please know, there's nothing wrong with desiring godly children whose lives are eternally secured in Christ. This is the most loving thing a mother can desire for her children. And we should certainly labor for that. But it's a sin to allow this good desire to be the hope and reason why you train them up in the love and discipline of the Lord—because it becomes an idol. The only reason why we should or shouldn't do anything, is for the pleasure, honor and glory of God. If your heart's sole purpose in training your children as God commands is because you love Him first and foremost, then your hard heart-work will not be in vain. You will not be prone to pride if your children walk with the Lord, nor will you be crushed if they don't. No matter the results, you will remain steadfast in hope, persevere in your labor for your children without bitterness, be patient in tribulation, fervent in prayer, bless them if they persecute you, rejoice with them in righteousness, and live peaceably with them as much as it is up to you (Rom 12:9-21).

Parenting isn't for wimps, the selfish, militant nor manipulative person who simply have children to gratify their already overweening egos. That's not parenting, that's propagating your own agenda much like Hitler who brainwashed, manipulated and militantly misled people to follow his ideal world; which included squashing the ideas and lives of others who didn't agree or fit into his utopia.

By God's immense grace He allows us to procreate and enjoy the blessing of having little ones entrusted to our care and raise them by His design, not ours. By His good and wise counsel, God has instructed us to lovingly train up our children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord (Eph 6:4). This instruction isn't some sort of archaic, impersonal commandment, but rather a glorious privilege and gift from God on how to best care for our precious children in accordance with His perfect Word rather than our fallible opinions.

"All have turned aside; together have become worthless; no one does good, not even one...And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who seek Him."

~Romans 3:12, Hebrews 11:6 (ESV)

Only through the hearing and receiving of the Gospel of Jesus Christ can any parent train up their children in the Way (that is, the narrow and holy way of Christ) they should go. If we don't understand the Gospel and if we haven't truly received it, the message of hope and the freedom found only in Christ can never be obtained, lived or taught.

It's only by God's grace that any of us are saved and it's only by His special grace upon His chosen people that we are kept and sanctified by the power of His Holy Spirit. I can't save either of my sons, but I can share and live the Gospel before them. I can't make them love God and others. But I can love God and others before them. I can't make them compassionate and considerate people. But I can demonstrate this through sacrificial service to them and others. I can't make them humble and thankful. But I can submit to my Lord Jesus and my husband joyfully and speak of the gratitude I have for the provisions God has made in my life.

Now that my sons are grown, I often ask myself, "Could I have done better?" And the answer is assuredly "YES!" There are so many things I've recently learned that I wish I knew two decades ago. But I didn't. And I know God allowed for that so I don't beat myself over the head with it. So what do I do with this new and improved parenting information I didn't have to benefit my children? I turn to those who are behind me and share this nugget of wisdom with them so their children can benefit. After all, what good is a blessing if you don't share it with others?

And this is the consolation: though none of us parents perfectly, by God's grace our children will be what He has ordained in His book in conjunction with our obedience, and even in spite of our disobedience. So though we may not be able to personally use all the wisdom about parenting we will continue to learn throughout our lives, we can still have the joy and privilege of passing them onto those who are raising the next generation.

"Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in Your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them...And I am sure of this, that He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ...if we are faithless, He remains faithful—for He cannot deny Himself."

~Psalm 139:16, Philippians 1:6, 2 Timothy 2:13 (ESV)

For the past month our oldest son has been asking me what I want for Mother's Day. I've had no other ideas to offer him except one: that he aspire nothing greater than to grow in the grace and knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ; walk closely with Him and that love for the Almighty be preeminent in his life.

I'm 45 now and I pretty much have everything I need or want. When you get to be my age, there's very little you desire that money can buy. The things that are most cherished are the things of the heart. And since Christ is my Lord and Savior, His Holy Spirit inhabits my heart and directs my desires to be more like Christ and less like I was pre-second birth (Rom 8:28-29, Gal 2:20).

The desires of our flesh begin to wane as we draw nearer to the Lord Jesus. We begin to see things with the new spiritual eyes He gave us. And the things we treasure are no longer the things that satisfy our flesh. We begin only to long for the greater things—the things that satisfy the Spirit of Christ within us.

"What shall I render to the LORD for all His benefits to me? I will lift up the cup of salvation and call on the name of the LORD, I will pay my vows to the LORD in the presence of all His people."

~Psalm 116:12-14 (ESV)

This Mother's Day is bitter sweet for me as I only have one son still in my life. Our second son, as many of you have already read, is our prodigal and has disdained and rejected all that our most generous and gracious Lord has blessed him with through our family. Sadly, our son is a scoffer (Prov 9:7, 13:1) and prefers to join himself with people who tickle his ears (Prov 26:28, 27:6) rather than love him and build him up in the truth (Ps 141:5).

Because we have the love of Christ, we have much pity for our son gone astray and for those helping him in his rebellion. There is no safer or lovelier place than in the Lord Jesus, and they're all missing out on the greatest Gift.

May our merciful and compassionate LORD grant them all godly grief (2 Cor 7:9-10).

"It is only as Christ's words remain in us and we remain in him that we will be delivered from the rootless Christianity so characteristic of our times."

~Sinclair Ferguson (A Heart for God)

The greatest gift a mother's heart desires is not for gold, trinkets or anything that will fade away with this world. But the greatest desire any God-fearing and Christ-loving mother has, is to see her children, all her children, walking in truth (1 Jn 3:18). And this is something she can't do for them.

There's a point and time in every person's life where they need to take responsibility for the gifts and even sin patterns they have. Every saved person can choose to use their God-given strengths to overcome the sinful temptations of their flesh, or they can ignore the good and revel in the evil.

A mother can neither take the credit for the fruit and blessings of a godly child, nor can she take the blame for one gone astray. The best and most loving thing a mother can do is be obedient to God's Word (Deut 6:6-9, Prov 31:26) and diligently train up her children in the loving discipline and instruction of the LORD; and trust Him for the results.

My heart echoes what Job aptly spoke, "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD." (Job 1:21, ESV).

"We turn to God when our foundations are shaking, only to learn that it is God who is shaking them."

~Charles West

Though this Mother's Day will be bitter sweet, it will be more sweet than bitter because Jesus is still on the throne and the Almighty is still sovereign. Therefore, I choose to relish the goodness of Christ my Savior and thank Him for both my sons, the one who strives for holiness and the one who has spurned God's goodness. All children are gifts from God (Ps 127:3); therefore, I am grateful and rejoice!

Imagine being invited to a reconciliation meeting. You're excited to get some painful issues resolved in the love of Christ and arrive with great expectations. Then suddenly, out of nowhere your heart is riddled with a barrage of friendly fire. Fabricated accusations based on the testimony of known false witnesses are shot at you with such rapid succession, you're instantly disoriented and gravely wounded.

You can hardly catch your breath from this surprise and most unexpected attack. And you struggle to see clearly through the muddle.

To make things worse, prior to this ambush, you were already suffering from heartache, sleepless nights, depressing days; and the extreme anguish that every prodigal causes a parent.

You entered the room deeply wounded, but with great hope, you came to sow peace. Instead, you leave crippled by heartless and unfounded accusations coupled by the lack of compassion and grace offered by the other witnesses in the room.

I don't have to imagine this, because it happened to me and sadly, I know this is not an isolated incident; it's happened to many, and perhaps, it's happened to you.

If you've suffered painful friendly fire from fellow Christians as I have, please hear my following words as words of comfort, understanding and encouragement to you. We all need biblical accountability, so please accept my words as an arm around your injured shoulder rather than a finger jabbing into your raw wound.

Though I was unjustly accused and though there were legitimate reasons for me to be hurt, after much prayer and meditating on God's Word, I realized the ambush began before the meeting...at least it did for me.

It's difficult when Christians falsely accuse one another, but when a person ambushes themselves...well, that just exposes a deeper level of human depravity.

Sound strange? How can a person ambush themselves? I'll tell you how. First you have to be injured, justly or unjustly, it doesn't matter. Then you have to wallow in self-pity rather than submerge yourself in the Word of God. After you've taken these necessary steps, then you have to enter every conversation about your injury with the heart to be heard rather than enter with a heart to listen to the Holy Spirit's leading (Matt 27:12). If you follow these steps precisely, you too will be able to accomplish the rare feat of ambushing yourself, like I have. But I don't recommend it.

"The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? 'I the LORD search the heart and test the mind, to give every man according to his ways, according to the fruit of his deeds.'"

~Jeremiah 17:9-10 (ESV)

You see, according to God, our omniscient and sovereign Creator, before we deceive others, we first deceive ourselves. It sounds like a strange thing to do, deceive oneself. But sin has a way of making even the strongest person (like Samson) succumb to irrational thinking and behavior.

One of the dangers of self-deception is self-pity. It's so dangerous because most don't view it as harmful. As a matter of fact, most of us (including me) can be fooled into believing it's acceptable and too often, we Christians support one another in it rather than rebuke one another from it (Prov 27:6).

Please don't get me wrong. I'm not denying we're all human and need time to heal from unjust attacks. But if we turn to one another over and over again, not to be lifted with God's Word, but only to gain a sympathetic crowd so we can mull over the gory details repeatedly; we're not in the right. Asaph knows this well (cf. Psalm 73).

Rather than prepare myself for that reconciliation meeting with much Scripture reading, study and meditation so that my spirit was better inclined to the Holy Spirit (Ps 119:33-40), I entered with my pain alone. So it's no surprise, that's all I left with.

This situation I put myself in is no different than a soldier going into battle without all his gear and armor. As God's holy and dearly beloved children, we're well-equipped and given the most impenetrable armor—the armor of God (Eph 6:10-17). And like a fool, I left home without it and was wrongly shocked when I sustained caustic injury.

Only the weak continually blame others and wallow in self-pity. But those of us who have been born of the Spirit of Christ have been given every spiritual blessing and provision (Eph 1:18-19, 2 Pet 1:3-4) to stand up from under the sinful desires of our dead flesh and walk in the newness of life (1 Cor 10:13, Rom 6:4-7).

Jesus Christ unjustly suffered spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically more than any human being who has lived, is living and will ever live. Yet, He remained steadfast in prayer (Lk 5:16), so that in everything He might bring glory, honor and praise to the Father alone. And because of the Father's love and great mercy on us, by His grace He has called us higher than we could ever hope to travel in our own strength—the narrow road to holiness (1 Pet 1:13-16).

Because Christ suffered, died and was raised from the dead, those who are in Him have been raised to bear His reproach and also His victory over sin. Therefore we don't have to give into self-pity and wallow in the cesspool of "poor me" or "oh my". No, we do what Job did and recognize that in love, God allows both evil and good to come to our lives, and that is where we find out greatest comfort and strength.

Next time you're tempted to wallow in the vanity of self-pity ask yourself what I'm now committed to asking myself, "If God allows both pleasures and pains to come to my life for my greatest good (conformity to the image of Christ), then how can I love one and despise the other?"

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose. For those whom He foreknew He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, in order that He might be the firstborn among many brothers...So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light and momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal."

~Romans 8:28-29, 2 Corinthians 4:16-18 (ESV)

"Now before the Feast of the Passover, when Jesus knew that His hour had come to depart out of this world to the Father, having loved His own who were in the world, He loved them to the end." (John 13:1, ESV)

No matter how many times I read this verse, I'm always in awe of what it says. While Jesus was fully aware of the utter torment and anguish He was about to endure that very night, His thoughts were not on Himself and what horrors would befall Him, but His full attention and love were fixed on His beloved apostles.

The original Greek for the phrase "loved them to the end" means that Jesus demonstrated God's perfect and pure (agape) love to His disciples, continually and fully; to completion, even in His darkest hour.

I'm in a dark place right now as my heart aches deeply for our youngest son, our prodigal, who is no longer walking in God's truth, but walking rebelliously in the deceptive world where truth is relative rather than absolute. While in this dark time, I often struggle with depression which causes me to disparage every new day, sure it will be filled with more sorrow upon sorrow.

But when I run to the LORD for help and protection (Prov 18:10), I get to read passages like this one in John 13. Immediately the Lord lifts me (Matt 14:30-31) out of the miry pit of despair and sets my feet on solid ground, making my steps secure. He puts a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to my God (Ps 40:1-3) and I am saved from the gravity of sadness that continually tries to pull me back.

When I read John 13 verse one, I'm encouraged that though my Lord and Savior looked straight onto the dire anguish of the Cross, He never forgot His disciples, whom He loved, and considered their low estate (Phil 2:4-8). Rather than be consumed with Himself and what He would suffer, Jesus was more concerned about His disciples and what they were about to suffer...though incomparable to His own suffering. And in His great love for them, He prayed for their protection, their unity, their love for God and one another, and that the Gospel would go forth to all the world.

Jesus' thoughts were on the Father's glory, His will and our greatest good―eternal salvation.

This is encouraging to me because in 1 Corinthians two verse 16 we're told that God has given us the mind of Christ! Having repented of my sins and trusted fully in the Son of God for my life, I am sealed with the Holy Spirit who alone knows the mind of the Father (1 Cor 2:10-11) and now through Christ, is given also to me. Rather than be enslaved to my own tormenting thoughts, I am free to fix my mind on the things above rather than on the things below. Because of Jesus' finished work on the Cross, I have been empowered from on high to think on that which is: true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, and worthy of praise (Phil 4:8).

Like Christ my Savior who did this over 2,000 years ago in John 13, I too can do and am doing―meditating on God's promises, considering what most pleases the Father; and after looking upward, I look outward to seek whom I may love and serve to the end.

"always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies... So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light and momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we do not look to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal."

~2 Corinthians 4:10, 16-18 (ESV)

No matter where you find yourselves today: physically, emotionally or spiritually, if by faith, you've repented and trusted in Jesus Christ, then be encouraged that you too have this rich and glorious gift in Him; the freedom to live fully in Christ (Gal 2:20) and perceive this life in the magnificent light of what's waiting for us in Heaven (1 Cor 13:12).

Read Psalm 22 today. Then thank Jesus for all He endured for you so that you might become something neither you nor anyone else could ever make you to be―a holy and beloved child of God Most High.

Just as our Savior did, we should do also; live in this world, but never be of it (Jn 17:14-18, Rom 12:2, 1 Jn 3:1-3).

May you all have a blessed and joyous time celebrating our Lord's Resurrection Day.

Peace be with you.

prodigal (ˈprä-di-gəl) adj 1: exceedingly or recklessly wasteful.

Before I share where our youngest son, our prodigal is today, I want you to join me as I remember where we've been; soberly view where we are now; and with great hope, share where we're headed.

From the day we found out God blessed us with each son; beautiful gifts of life growing inside of me, we sang songs of worship and read Scriptures to our boys so their lives (as much as it was up to us) would be saturated with God's grace, peace and love.

Every moment was beautiful, even the hard moments when we nearly lost both of them. Our oldest son was born with a rare condition called pyloric stenosis. If this developed, it usually happened two months after birth, but Michael was born with it; so by the time he was only two weeks old, he required emergency surgery so he wouldn't die from starvation. He's now a very healthy and robust 21 year old young man and we are grateful to the Lord!

At two months of age, it was discovered that our youngest son had a weak lower esophageal sphincter (LES) that would open during digestion; causing excessive vomiting. Pyloric spasms aggravated the issue and intensified the vomiting (about 180 times during the daytime hours and 198 times during the nighttime hours). Surgery was highly recommended, but it was a surgery that would adversely affect the rest of his life. So after much prayer, Jim and I consulted with our wonderful pediatrician God blessed us with, who agreed there were home remedies (along with strong prescription medications necessary to strengthen Kevin's LES) we could implement.

It was a tough three years, but we got through what we thought and hoped would be the worst years of his life. But one night, while Jim and I were out celebrating our ninth wedding anniversary (a week after Kevin's sixth birthday) we were called by paramedics who informed us that our precious son was hit by a car. We met them at the hospital and later discovered he had a two inch break in his skull and needed to be taken to Children's Medical Center to be seen by pediatric neurosurgeons.

Due to his difficult infant years and near fatal car accident, I was compelled to be more careful with Kevin and keenly sensitive to him being injured in any way. I didn't want anyone to hurt him physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually. I felt he had enough pain and I just wanted him to enjoy the life God gave him. But I think I wanted this too much at times. So much so, I let things go with him, things I never allowed Michael to be excused from. I may have been too lenient with Kevin. I don't know.


Then my husband reminded me of God's Word in Exodus 32:30-35, 33:19, Jeremiah 17:9-10 and Psalm 115:3. He rightly encouraged me to remember who God is—sovereign, good and loving. And he exhorted me to trust the Lord with my son, all that's happened in the past, all that's happening now and all that will happen in the future. He reminded me that Kevin is responsible for his own choices...not us. He also reminded me that though he and I we didn't grow up in Christian homes (as I shared in my previous article) by God's grace, we were able to make wise choices.

"Your testimonies are wonderful; therefore my soul keeps them. The unfolding of Your words gives light; it imparts understanding to the simple...I lift my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the LORD, who made heaven and earth."

~Psalm 119:129-130, 121:1-2

God never promised we wouldn't suffer in this world. As a matter of fact, Jesus said just the opposite in John 16:33. But the promise is that He has overcome the deadly sting of all our pains; therefore in Him, we too have overcome them and can suffer them well (2 Cor 4:16-18).

So how can I suffer well with my prodigal son, my precious babe from my womb whom I love more than my own life and would give it in an instant if it would solve all his problems?

I can suffer well with my son by:

• Keeping my marriage covenant rather than allowing this adversity to divide me and my husband with the blame game, or silently suffering alone (which, being an introvert, I'm very inclined to do).
• Listening to my husband's wise counsel rather than shrug it off as just some "nice" things he's saying to cheer me up and help me "move on".
• Still loving him God's way, found in God's Word, rather than compromising and loving him as the world and he would like me to, that is, to condone everything he says or does for the sake of false peace.
• Remaining steadfast in God's Word so if he returns, I can hold him up, if he can't stand.
• Praying for him and not against him.
• Being true to who I am in Christ, weeping when necessary, rejoicing as it comes and never putting on a show just so others will think well of me.
• Reminding him he is loved and always welcome home...with any means God's provides...perhaps even with this article.

When Kevin was seriously injured after his car accident, my husband was hurriedly driving and said, "I'll drive, while you pray." I was in shock and my mind was blank after getting off the phone with the paramedics so I didn't know what to pray. Then I recalled God's Word in Romans 8:26 and I thanked Him for His Spirit's intercession on our son's behalf. Immediately after I gave thanks, the Lord reminded me of a passage I read almost exactly two years prior to this incident: Psalm 126:5-6. And this is the prayer that gave me hope then, and even now as I strive to suffer well with my precious prodigal son.

"Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy! He who goes out weeping, bearing seed for sowing, shall come home with shouts of joy, bringing sheaves with him."

~Psalm 126:5-6

I pray my precious son Kevin will be included in the sheaves I get to bring with me when Christ returns or calls me Home.

If you're reading this son, the door is open.

In short...no.

"If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. By this My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be My disciples. As the Father has loved Me, so have I loved you. Abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father's commandments and abide in His love. These things I have spoken to you, that MY JOY may be in you, and that YOUR JOY may be FULL."

~John 15:7-11

I’m sure you’re familiar with the latest story about Utah dad, Scott Mackintosh who donned a pair of homemade Daisy Duke-like shorts while on a family outing, to convince his 19-year-old daughter Myley that her choice of immodest apparel was unacceptable.

Prior to this latest escapade of child-shaming tactics as a form of discipline, there were others.

Back in April 2012, 15-year-old Quandria Bryant of North Carolina was made to carry a sign on Highway 17 in New Bern that said, “I have a bad attitude. I disrespect [sic] people who try to help me.” Her father Donnell employed this public shaming tactic after Quandria was suspended from school for her increasingly disrespectful attitude toward her ninth grade teachers.

My question is, was her dad involved prior to her disrespectful escalation that led to her suspension? As a parent, I know schools don’t do this without some warnings to the student and parents. So what forms of discipline, if any, were incorporated prior to this public shaming?

In March of this year, 13-year-old Kayla Nickell from Crestview, Florida was forced by her parents to hold a sign on the corner of Ferdon Boulevard and U.S. Highway 90 that said, “I’m a Self-entitled teenager w/NO Respect for authority. I’m also super smart, yet I have 3 ‘D’s’ because I DON’T CARE!”

The parents admit Kayla’s increasingly disrespectful attitude along with dropping grades happened after her uncle (whom she was very close to) was killed in December 2011 while serving in Afghanistan.

The Nickells claim they had to do this to Kayla because the loss was difficult for everyone in the family, but Kayla’s the only one who behaved so badly and they felt that “she kind of gave up.” Well of course she did. Isn’t this somewhat of a normal reaction...for anyone, child or adult?

Where’s the sacrificial love and understanding? Was there a family grief counselors involved? Did her parents daily provide her with a non-judgmental and safe place for her to share what she was feeling or thinking, no matter how ugly her thoughts and feelings might’ve been?

The Nickells claim to be Christians, so the greatest confusion I have is why didn’t they search God’s Word for His wise counsel? Why did they prefer to employ a shaming technique suggested by a “parenting coach” when Kayla was seven or eight?

Shortly after this incident, in May 2013, 10-year-old Kaylee was publicly shamed by her father’s long-time companion Ally, because Kaylee was bullying another fourth grader at school for how she dressed. After one reportedly ineffective conversation with Kaylee, Ally resorted to purchasing a wardrobe that would publicly humiliate Kaylee. Ally made her wear them to school for two days so Kaylee could see what it felt like to be bullied and taunted.

My first concern here is, Ally isn’t even Kaylee’s mother...not even her step-mother (which many stories purport, though Ally is not married to Kaylee’s father). Kaylee’s father has full custody of her (a rarity), which obviously means there are painful issue with her biological mother.

My next concern is, why did the teacher email Ally regarding Kaylee’s poor behavior at school, rather than her biological father? And why after only one conversation with a 10-year-old girl that didn’t immediately produce a repentant attitude, cause Ally to decide to publicly shame her as a form of discipline?

My goodness, if these exasperated schemes to discipline, teach a lesson or get a point across were exercised by our employers when we weren’t “getting it” at our jobs, how would that affect us...as adults? I mean, when’s the last time someone corrected you, and you immediately responded with a positive and agreeable attitude? Exactly. Most of us don’t, and we’re adults; yet we expect immature children to respond to difficult situations in life in a manner we don’t even expect from ourselves.

In reality, us adults have a lot of trouble getting through this life without some outbursts of disrespect to authority, allowing our pride to get away with us, refusing help from others and altogether behaving in unacceptable ways.

Though these public shaming campaigns seem to be on the rise and well applauded by both Christians and non-Christians, the question still remains—is it right?

I say it’s not, because I can’t find an example of this in God’s Word.

As a Christian, I’m granted the beautiful comfort and serene joy of knowing that God Almighty alone is perfect, and that His Word details all that any human being needs to navigate well through this life.

I see three important things that appear to have been overlooked or purposely ignored in all the stories of public shaming (which are not exhausted in this article) as a form of discipline.

beautiful photo used by permission: Gilbert Lennox www.GilbertLennoxPhotograpy.com

In my last post, I shared why I no longer follow John Piper and "Desiring God" ministry, but I continue to love him, pray for him, the ministry, and anyone who's following them, to practice discernment and test everything from anyone (including me of course) with the Word of God, which alone is perfect.

What motivated me to share this is my love for God, His Word and for my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ who have been misled by the a recent resurgence of an article written by John Piper's, once prodigal son (now believer in Christ), Abraham, regarding 12 ways parents of prodigals can love their children to the Lord Jesus Christ.

I found this article years ago, and agreed with some of it, and disagreed with much of it as it contained quite a bit of worldly psychology and little Scriptural foundation for how parents of prodigals ought to shepherd their children's heart toward repentance and faith in Christ.

Up until the other day, I hadn't really thought much about it, until it resurfaced in social media and was re-printed in Billy Graham's "Decision Magazine",  First Boynton and mentioned on Christianity Today's interview with John Piper in March of 2012; with which many are sharing links to these sites and passing this I'm sure, well-meaning, yet dangerous advice to parents (like me) who have prodigals. It's dangerous because it has just enough truth sprinkled in that if a Christian is not on guard, they will be deceived into believing the hollow, worldly philosophies that are shared in this article.

Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world...Now these Jews were more noble than those in Thessalonica; they received the word with all eagerness, examining the Scriptures daily to see if these things were so.

~1 John 4:1, Acts 17:11

I want to assure all of you that I have nothing personal against John Piper, his son Abraham, or the Desiring God ministry.


Abraham Piper's article (12 Ways to Love Your Wayward Child) is making it's way around the internet, into homes and unfortunately, into the hearts of well-meaning and heart-broken parents of prodigals who are desperate to find ways to help their child to know Christ as Lord and Savior.

click photo to enlarge and read

Though I believe Abraham Piper wrote this with altruistic intentions, that doesn't trump biblical teaching or release any of God's children from being obedient to God's Word first; for to our heavenly Father, this is love (1 John 5:3). 

When we are not careful to test everything with the Word of God no matter who is speaking, we jeopardize our training in righteousness and participate in misleading others away from biblical parenting and help draw them to sentimental vanity—mere chasing after the wind. 

My husband and I know this all too well, as we have a prodigal and it's already heartbreaking enough to have one, but Abraham Piper's article does more to give fuel to the fire of a prodigal's heart rather than allow their heart to be reconciled to God, through repentance and faith in Christ. And you don't have to take my word for it. Click the photo (on right) of what our youngest and wayward son, who we dearly love, wrote in regards to his thoughts on Abraham Piper's article.

Unfortunately, Abraham Piper's article mirrors Dr. Spock and other worldly psychologist who advise parents not to say anything "negative" to their children; just praise them for good behavior and they'll naturally begin to implement good morals into their lives; though God says, the only natural inclination any of us have is to sin until we have our sins illuminated for us with the light of the Gospel of Jesus Christ (Rom 7:7).

"The law of the LORD is perfect,reviving the soul; the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple; the precepts of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart; the commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes; the fear of the LORD is clean, enduring forever; the rules of the LORD are true, and righteous altogether. More to be desired are they than gold, even much fine gold; sweeter also than honey and drippings of the honeycomb."

~Psalm 19:7-10

Below are Abraham Piper's 12 Ways to Love Your Wayward Child and my comments regarding each step.

1. Point them to Christ: Agreed because of Deut 6:5-9, Eph 6:4.


2. Pray: Agreed because of 1 Thess 5:17.


3. Acknowledge something is wrong: Agreed because of Job 32:21-22; Prov 3:11-12, 6:20-23,  13:24, 19:18, 26:28; Ps 94:8-15; John 8:31-32. Never lie or flatter your children...or really, anyone for that matter, for both lying and flattering are sins and all professing Christians ought to abstain from practicing both.


4. Don't expect them to be Christlike: Semi-agree. If you've raised your child as you ought, in the love and discipline of the Lord (Eph 6:4) and at some point in their lives (much like Abraham Piper and our sons) they confess Christ as Lord, then you should expect them to behave Christlike, as we are commanded to do with all believers (Col 1:9-10). But should they, later in life (like Abraham Piper and our youngest son) confess they are only a false convert, then yes, you should no longer expect them to be Christlike, but as Christian parents, your love and devotion is to Christ first, therefore your household (that may include believers and unbelievers) ought honor God by adhering to  God's precepts for a Christian home (Joshua 24:15). Remember, you're responsible to God Almighty first,  and you will have to answer to Him about how you did or did not uphold His standard for your family (2 Cor 5:9-10).


5. Welcome them home: Here Abraham Piper says that parents of prodigals ought to welcome, condone and cover their child's wicked and sinful behavior, "If your daughter stinks like weed or an ashtray, spray her jacket with Febreeze and change the sheets when she leaves, but let her come home...If your son is broke because he spent all the money you lent him on loose women and ritzy liquor, then forgive his debt as you've been forgiven...and let him come home. If he hasn't been around for a week and a half because he's been staying at his girlfriend's—or boyfriend's apartment, urge them not to go back, and let him come home."
   
   I'm sure Abraham Piper meant well, but to advise a Christian parent to simply "let them come home", with no word of wise instruction, reprove or rebuke (when necessary), but just "cover up" their sins and harbor their wicked lifestyle in the comfort and protection of your home, completely defies God's word and instruction on how to parent (Deut 6:5-9, Matt 10:37, Prov 22:6, Ps 94:12, Prov 5:21-23, 19:18, 29:17).
   
   Rather than encourage parents to adhere to God's biblical model that commands a parent to: reveal why your child's participation in wickedness is destroying them, and because you love them, you beg them to stop and can't condone it by giving them a "cover" in which to continue (for though you forgive them for wasting your money on lascivious and debased living), you'll give them an opportunity to work to pay back the money to teach them what God tells us to teach them: What they reap, they will sow and those who do not work, should not eat (Gal 6:7-8, 2 Thess 3:10).
   
   God never commands His children to condone or simply "cover up" sin, rather we are commanded to lovingly, compassionately and truthfully confront it (Eph 5:7-11), especially with those we  claim to love. According to God, to do what Abraham Piper suggests here, is displaying hatred towards your child as you condone and harbor their sinful lifestyle with the deceptive ideology of love, according to this world and not according to God.


6. Plead with them more than you rebuke them: "She probably knows—especially if she was raised as a Christian—that what she's doing is wrong. And she definitely knows you think it is, so she doesn't need this pointed out...Your gentle forbearance and sorrowful hope will show her that you really do trust Jesus." Completely disagree. Just because someone is raise in a Christian home doesn't automatically mean they agree with God's definition of right or wrong (which is often the reason they reject the Lord [John 7:7, Prov 15:5, 18:2]), therefore doesn't already know or recognize when they're in error or sin.
   
   This is why loving Christian parents need restrain their prodigal child's foolishness by faithfully, lovingly, compassionately and patiently teaching them truth from error (2 Tim 2:24-26, Heb 12:11)  in accordance with God's Word to prove it's God's definition of right and wrong, and not the parents; that way, whether or not they want to dispute it, you can lean on the Lord and simply answer, "As you can see for yourself, this is what God says about this matter. If you have a problem with it, take it up with Him, not me." (Ps 40:1-2, Prov 3:5-8). Remember, open rebuke is better than hidden love (Prov 27:5), and faithfully speaking painful truths to your rebellious child is what God says is good and trustworthy (Prov 27:6).


7. Connect them to other believers. Semi-agree...again. Abraham Piper writes: "Obviously, you are distant from your wayward child; otherwise you wouldn't think they're wayward. This is another reason why pleading is better than rebuking—your relationship with your rebellious child is tenuous and should be protected if at all possible. But rebuke is still necessary. A lot of rebellious kids would do well to hear that they're being fools, but you're probably not the one to tell them. Try to keep other Christians in their lives and trust God to connect your son or daughter with a believer who can point out your child's folly without getting the door slammed on them." 
   
   
   It's just as inaccurate to say that a parent of a prodigal is distant from their child, as it is to assume that simply because parents are close to their children their children must not be wayward; that's just nonsense...I know, I have a rebellious child (I'll share more about that later). As we covered, pleading rather than reproving or rebuking your children is not a biblical precept, but rather a worldly, feel-good ruse that supports lazy parenting and deceives well-meaning parents into believing that all praise with no sage produces a humble and repentant heart that submits to the authority and Lordship of the Son of God, Jesus, the Christ.
   
   
   While I'm delighted to hear that Abraham agrees rebuke is necessary, it's completely unbiblical and emasculating to tell parents they ought not assert their God-given authority and obey God's command for every Christian parent to disciple (which includes rebuke) their own children. I believe this worldly philosophy is one of the greatest stimulants for lazy, unbiblical parenting and the reason why Christian families don't seem to fair much better than those of this world's.
   
   I'm not saying that having godly influence from outside of your family is not beneficial, I'm saying that to advise parents to solely rely on outside influence is both foolish and unbiblical. Furthermore, to say they ought rather "trust God to connect your son or daughter with a believer who can point out your child's folly" implies a parent who actually asserts their God-given authority over their children, are distrusting God. This only creates more heartache and confusion than it helps.
   
   


8. Respect their friends. Very partially agree. "Of course your daughter's relationships are founded on sin. And, yes, her friends are bad for her. But she's bad for them, too. And nothing will be solved by making it evident that you don't like who she's hanging around with. Be hospitable. Her friends are someone else's wayward children, and they need Jesus, too." The word "respect" in the verb form (as used here in Abraham's statement), means to esteem or hold in high honor; or to show regard or consideration for. So, I agree that parents should show regard or consideration, that is, the love of Christ (which can't be severed from truth since God is love and God is truth [1 John 4:8, John 14:6]). But I disagree with this statement if Abraham means what I've seen many parents erroneously practice...showing honor to their children's friends who are disrespectful, wayward children themselves.
   
   I agree with Abraham that parents should be hospitable, but it should never be for the purpose of palliating the sinful lifestyle of a rebellious child and their rebellious friends, rather it ought to be to demonstrate the awesome and high love of God that bears all things, but doesn't condone all things—namely, sin. Because God is holy and righteous, and has imputed the righteousness of Christ to all who've repented and believed in the only Son of God, we, as Christian parents must also behave in holiness and righteousness by loving our children and their friends enough to strongly warn them about their destructive behavior and how, without Christ, all they've lived, loved and worked for will come to nothing but ruin and despair (Gal 6:7-8).
   
   Let me put it to you this way. If you saw your wayward child and their friends walking through a beautiful mountain meadow, and since you've walked that path, you knew there was a hidden 50,000 foot drop within a few yards of where they were, wouldn't you run towards them, shouting "Stop! Stop! You're going to get hurt! You're going to die if you keep going in that direction!" Or would you simply say to yourself, "Well, they sure seem to be enjoying what their doing and I'm sure either someone else will strongly warn them or they will just figure it out for themselves."


9. E-mail them. Agree with two things and disagree with the rest. "When you read something in the Bible that encourages you and helps you love Jesus more, write it up in a couple of lines and send it to your child. The best exhortation—better than any correction—is for them to see Christ's joy in your life. Don't stress out when you're composing these as if each one needs to be singularly powerful. Just whip them out and let the cumulative effect of your satisfaction in God gather up in your child's inbox. God's Word is never useless." I agree that you should use every form of communication God has provided you to reach your rebellious child for Christ. But let us move towards rightly understanding how God defines exhortation. In Acts 2:40, 1 Thess 3:2, 2 Tim 4:2, Titus 2:15 and Heb 3:13 and in Eph 6:22, Col 4:8, 1 Thess 5:11 the Greek word used for both 'exhort' and 'encourage' is from the Greek word παρακαλεο (transliteration: parakaleó) which means to: call near, beseech, intreat. The dictionary.com definition for exhort is along the same lines: to urge, advise, or caution earnestly; admonish urgently or to give urgent advice, recommendations, or warnings.
   
   As you can see neither the original Greek word parakaleó or the common dictionary definition for the word 'exhort' coincides with Abraham Piper's usage of the word in this statement, "the best exhortation—better than any correction..." Like many in the church today, Abraham seems to think one can exhort without giving correction, when the clear definition of exhort is exactly: To urge those who are wayward to turn from their error and call them near for the purpose of repentance, that is, to cease from doing what is evil and turn to what is good. Encourage means the same thing: To instill the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc., without fear.
   
   I think one of the biggest problems we have in the church, is that for far too long  God's children have accepted the connotations of words our heavenly Father uses to teach and train us in all righteousness, rather than be students of the Word and test Scripture with Scripture so that we can rightly understand and handle the Sword of the Spirit (Jer 9:23-24, 2 Tim 2:15).
   
   Based on the actual meaning of these words (exhort and encourage), it would be foolish for any Christian to agree with the connotations of these words and desire to instill their wayward children to continue on their path of destruction without fear.


10. Take them to lunch. Mostly agree. I agree with pretty much everything Abraham shares on this point, except for his erroneous assumption that every prodigal is feeling guilty or ashamed about living a life that displeases and separates him/her from God and that a face-to-face meeting is more uncomfortable for your child because of this assumed guilt that many prodigals do not actually possess. One of the many reasons some rebellious children do not feel shame or guilt is because they're too busy reveling in their sin and disagree with you that it is wrong or destructive behavior.
    
    However, as God's dearly loved children, I absolutely agree that we ought not allow our only interactions with anyone we love to solely be through social media. Face-to-face gatherings are becoming obsolete in our fast-paced, lazy and self-made worlds where we not only believe our own press, but we think everyone else does too. Relationships are hard work and they need to be cultivated with the genuine love of Christ and earnest effort to personally meet with, demonstrate love and encourage one another.
    
    "For I long to see you, that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to strengthen you—that is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith, both yours and mine."
    ~Romans 1:11-12


11. Take an interest in their pursuits. "Odds are that if your daughter is purposefully rejecting Christ, then the way she spends her time will disappoint you...Jesus spent time with tax collectors and prostitutes, and He wasn't even related to them. Imitate Christ by being the kind of parent who will put some earplugs in your pocket and head downtown to where your daughter's CD release show is." While Abraham Piper's first statement is true, his advise for parents to participate and support their rebellious child's godless activities are not condoned by God (Eph 5:11, Jude 1:23, Rom 16:19). Also his second statement (that's sadly become a popular, yet unbiblical saying within the church) is close to blaspheming the holy character of Christ.
    
    Jesus never spent time with unrepentant sinners, and more specifically, while their were engaging in their sin (e.g., Jesus did not take a seat next to Matthew while he was collecting taxes, rather the Lord called Matthew away from his sinful practice, to follow Him [Matt 9:9]; Jesus did not attend a harlot's gathering, rather He forgave repentant adulterous women who fell at He's feet and then commanded them to "sin no more" [John 4:10-26 and 39, 8:9-11], etc.). In fact all throughout Scripture God is clear, He gives grace to humbled and repentant hearts while He opposes the prideful heart that calls good evil and evil good as they continue to live godless lives, without restraint.
    
    "Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers; but his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on His law he meditates day and night."
    ~Psalm 1:1-2


12. Point them to Christ. Wholeheartedly and joyfully agree because of: Romans 1:16-11; 2 Cor 4:16-18; Gal 6:7-10; Philippians 2:3, 17; 1 Tim 1:5; 1 Peter 4:7-11.
    
    Abraham Piper wisely points out why we, as parents of prodigals share the Gospel of Christ, love and exhort our wayward children: For their eternal salvation alone, and not so they are no longer an embarrassment to you or others in your family.
    
    Loving someone with God's love is never for any kind of self-gain or self-comfort, but purely to draw the greatest benefit for those you love—a saving faith in Christ Jesus the Lord (2 Cor 13:5; James 2:14; 1 John 4:1, 6, 5:3-5, 13).

"Whoever loves father and mother more than Me is not worthy of Me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me."

~Matthew 10:37